Reflecting on my reflection.

Have you ever stared into your reflection and just reflected on who you’ve been, who you are and who you will be? Self discovery is difficult and that’s definitely an understatement.

Who I’ve been…the poorest spoiled girl you’ve ever met. I always knew that I had a huge heart back then and I opened it and let it feel…everything. Disappointments, anger, betrayal, crushes, pain, happiness. Any and everything. I allowed myself to believe in love. Fairy tales existed. I genuinely cared about everyone in my life. I cared about what people thought of me and tried my best to people please.

Then, life happened. My heart hardened and I closed myself off from emotions. I didn’t allow myself time enough to be hurt, disappointed, afraid, ashamed, and everything else in between. I kept myself busy and just let my body be used by men that didn’t care about anything beyond my sweet hips and warm welcome. There were no more fairy tales or happily ever after.

Where is that girl? That sweet innocence. Where did it go? I guess it’s lost amongst life’s misfortunes, setbacks, ironies and trickeries. Someone tell me where I can go to get myself back! Can I climb through that very mirror and grab a hold of myself and SHAKE myself awake?

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